The Megastar and the weather girl Dedicated to Sian Lloyd

I’d love to take her out with me

But I doubt the lady will agree

You see I’m Gongle the Megastar

She’ll think it is a dream too far


Everyone wants a piece of me

Doubt she’ll cope with publicity

She’ll be too afraid to take my hand

Be seen with someone quite so grand


Of course her fears are quite unfounded

For a Megastar I’m quite well grounded

I’ll mix with anyone – even lowly folk

I’m out of her league but I’m a lovely bloke


She’d love to parade me round the town

See her friends with envious frowns

Yes I must admit I’m quite a catch

Look out men you’ve met your match!


So Sian Pluck up your courage dear

I’ll show you a good time, have no fear

Whisk you away in my private plane

To my island where it never rains


Most ladies would die for a chance like this

Put nerves aside for a taste of bliss

My culinary skills are famed world wide

Like my egg and chips with beans on the side


When you’ve dined in style fit for a queen

I’ll regale you with tales of the places I’ve been

Then I’ll show you all the awards I’ve won

I might even let you have a hold of one


I’ll introduce you to my staff

But pay no heed if they should laugh

For they’re used to meeting model types

Ignore their comments and their snipes


I’ll end the evening with a surprise

Sweet Sian you won’t believe your eyes

Not roses, they’re for men who’re meek

I will shower you with leeksJ         (see what I did there? Shower………weather girl)

Don’t think that you’re not good enough

I’m used to ladies who are rough

Who drink like fish and smoke like Chimneys

You should see what passes for lady in Grimney!


The only downside, after we’ve dated

When you get home you’ll feel deflated

Back to the grind of ‘spits and spots’

And men who pretend to think you’re hot


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