I can’t believe the blog post that Meadow posted here yesterday! Tch, Women! I thought I’d better just let you know that I’m alive and kicking so you can all come out of mourning now:-)
Hopefully my little prank will teach Ursula not to be led on by that CLAM! I think he encouraged her to feed me berries believing them to be poisonous. They weren’t of course but I pretended to be ill so that Ursula would see the error of her ways:-)
Morton is extremely jealous of me and will do anything to get rid of me you see but, fear not, I am going NOWHERE!
I met up with some old friends in the woods who were having a wild party so I decided to join them to make it a party to remember for them:-)
I am extremely angry with Meadow as I’ve now heard that she told AnMarie, my girlfriend, that I had asked her to marry me. I would like to set the record straight right now, I did NOT ask Meadow to marry me. I think she thought I was dead and that if she told people that, she would inherit all my worldly goods, my island, private jet, classic cars and the billions stashed in my bank.
That’s the trouble with being so rich and handsome, you have to learn to spot the ‘gold diggers’ Fortunately, apart from being mega rich and painfully handsome I alao have a wonderful personality so in most cases when women ‘come on to me’ I know it’s genuine because they just can’t resist my charms.
Anyway, I apologise for the terrible shock you must have all had on reading Meadow’s post but you can relax I am very much alive:-)
Love Gongle x